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What Lead to The Best Amazon Review Ever...

THE Mook

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"...Indeed, he was so taken with them that he even wrote his first-ever comment on the retailer's site and gave them a glowing (and poetic) 5-star review.

"This is my first ever customer review of a product from Amazon. On December 6th, I ordered an XL Destination Truth t-shirt. Today, a box arrived with a set of these Hamburger Earmuffs, or as they're officially called, "Adult Cheeseburger Hamburger Earmuffs Ear Muffs." When I opened the box, I was confused. My first thought was, "this does not look like an XL Destination Truth t-shirt." I'm pretty astute after all. My second thought was, "did someone just ship me two delicious cheeseburgers?" But I quickly realized that these were no ordinary burgers. Trembling, I lifted the twin sirloins to my head. The soft fur of the faux-brioche bun gently cradled my ears, and the layers of genuine felt cheese and lettuce all but muted the sounds of the office copying machine. Proprietary Hamburger Earmuff technology blocked out a wide range of frequencies, and I was immediately transported into a quiescent world of zen-like contemplation. Closing my eyes, I feel deep into thought, deconstructing some of the universe's most mind-bending mysteries such as…ketchup. When I opened my eyes, nearly 9 hours had passed. It was night, and I was alone in the otherwise empty office. But more importantly, I was WARM. The heat from the Hamburger Earmuffs radiated through me like warm, mustard-flavored sunshine. Thanks, Amazon. You may not have shipped me my t-shirt, but you did deliver a holiday miracle."

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