IMADreamer Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 It sounds simple, but it's so easy to do. It's so easy to get caught up in work, and other other things that you forget to just live, trust me I know and it's costs me dearly. I'll admit, I've always been a hard worker, not to toot my own horn but growing up on a farm tends to do that to you. Those of you that have done it know there is always work to be done so you never are really "done" for the day, you just have to stop for the day. Well about two years ago I took on a bunch of extra work. Not only was I working my normal job but I was offered a job that was to lead to a career in what I studied in college. It meant working seven days a week but it was something I was willing to do to get where I wanted in life. Things were fine at first, I had a great girl who was very supportive of my goals and dealt with not seeing me much. She was used to it anyway as she joked that for 3 months in the fall she was a "harvest widow" when we would start corn harvest and I would disappear. However only a week apart my uncle was diagnosed with cancer and my father had a heart attack. All of this happened during the worst Mississippi River flooding since 1993 (we farm in the river bottoms) and during bean planting and wheat harvest. I did what had to be done, I told my boss at my full time job I needed a month off to take care of the farm and I basically said if that's not ok I quit. Well it was ok. So I began farming full time and then working my second job as well. There were days when I didn't sleep and what little time I did spend at home my gf was threatening to leave. I didn't listen. One day later that year after my family was able to get back farming but I was still helping because they still weren't well I came home after a long day to a note that said "you work three job and have me. Quit two of those four things and if one of them isn't me I'll come back." I was devastated but I felt she didn't understand that I was just trying to better my career and help my family on the side. She thought I was being selfish. She left. Flash forward to now and things haven't changed much. I'm still working my day job which pays my bills and working towards all my EPA certifications for what I'd hoped would be my career. It means 7 days a week working but it was supposed to mean a better future and a future of not having to work 7 days a week soon. Then the budget cuts came. The economy has hit everyone hard but particularly small municipal governments and my job will be cut at the end of the year. My career is no more and I put my life on hold for two years for nothing. The point of this story is that now as I approach 30 I'm back where I started. Except now I have lost a great girl, many friends, and the ability to have fun. That sounds dramatic but it's true. My gf who came back but left again for the same reason just said to me "you used to the most fun person I know to be around, funny, smart, kind, and caring. It was like I won the lottery of bfs, but you are truly lost now and I don't know who you are any more." That hurt. She then told me as she left that she hoped that someday I remembered how to live my life again. I hope so too. Don't make the same mistake I have. Follow your dreams and strive hard for your goals, but don't let them get in the way of what is really important because if your dreams and goals don't pan out you will be left with a big empty black hole right in the middle of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marylander Posted May 22, 2010 Share Posted May 22, 2010 Well, don't let things beat you down. There's only so much in life you can control, and everything you go through is a learning experience. In fact, for you to have this kind of clarity at 30 put you pretty far ahead of the game. Lots of people spend 50, 60, or 70 years before coming to grips with what's really important. Rich Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris@Adams Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Well, don't let things beat you down. There's only so much in life you can control, and everything you go through is a learning experience. In fact, for you to have this kind of clarity at 30 put you pretty far ahead of the game. Lots of people spend 50, 60, or 70 years before coming to grips with what's really important. Rich Well said! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sooners Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Well, don't let things beat you down. There's only so much in life you can control, and everything you go through is a learning experience. In fact, for you to have this kind of clarity at 30 put you pretty far ahead of the game. Lots of people spend 50, 60, or 70 years before coming to grips with what's really important. Rich Well said! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oupavoc Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Keep your head up mate, good things happen to people like you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doug123 Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMADreamer Posted May 23, 2010 Author Share Posted May 23, 2010 Thanks guys for the support. I'm just in a weird place all the sudden. No direction, no clue what to do next, but I know I gotta start enjoying life because the last 10 years flew, and I'll bet the next 10 will too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
70'sChevyGirl Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Your GF wasn't the right person for you. If she truly cared about you then she would have stuck with you through thick and thin. Things will get better for you and I am sure you will find your true soul mate that will stand by you with all of your choices whether they be good ones or bad ones. Hang in there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XQIZT Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Hang tight Jason...I've always found that things find a way of coming out right in the end. Your hard work is bound to pay off and before you know it, all the pieces will fall into place. I do agree with you though, there is more to life than work. Make sure there is that balance of fun too, because you NEVER know when your number is going to get called. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightMare Silverado Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 I've been through the ringer myself, fiancé of 5 years left and I have to fight for my kid now, dad has dementia, mom has graves, little sister tried to commit suicide by downing a bottle of pills, Its been a fun year:). Nothing you can do but move forward because looking back doesn't help anybody. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GXPaycheck Posted May 23, 2010 Share Posted May 23, 2010 Your GF wasn't the right person for you. If she truly cared about you then she would have stuck with you through thick and thin. Things will get better for you and I am sure you will find your true soul mate that will stand by you with all of your choices whether they be good ones or bad ones. Hang in there. Agree. Sounds tough, but it's true. Imagine where you would be if you got married. Hate to add a divorce to the list of problems. Character is being tested. She failed. Focus on getting through the tough times. Life happens. The brown smelly stuff is just a natural by-product. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DieselDude Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 All your hard work is paying off. You might not think so now but later on. Jason you are not looking down the road far enough. My career is no more and I put my life on hold for two years for nothing. Jason you did not put your life on hold for two years. Look at all the experience and knowledge that you obtained during this time. You can not put a price on what you have learned in your career. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IMADreamer Posted May 24, 2010 Author Share Posted May 24, 2010 Thanks guys. I guess I'm just gonna keep doing what I have been. Working hard and see what happens for now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duramaxsky Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 I also tend to work too hard. I also have had hard times. I have had things happen to me I never thought I would recover form. The strange thing is when it all straightens itself out you will find yourself in A better place than you planned on. You have the attitude and drive that will not let you fail. I just don't worry about it now. You can't control what happens around you so make the best of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
whiterp199 Posted May 24, 2010 Share Posted May 24, 2010 Keep your head up and you will get through it. You have gained experience in the last two years. Everything may seem rough now but pretty soon you will get out of this and realize it was for the better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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