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Something I had to share...

Team Adam's

By Team Adam's
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Team Adam's

Team Adam's

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As most of you know my son, Tanner, has Autism. Today my wife sent me the quote below (welcome to Holland) and it really touched me... this is the absolute best explanation of how it feels to be a parent of a child with special needs I have ever read.

 

Enjoy and pass it along with a little better understanding of my world. Thanks for reading!

 

BTW - I'm teaching Tanner to ride my new 44" bamboo longboard... the leg braces certainly aren't slowing my little guy down :)

 

IMG00020-20100323-1623.jpg

 

Welcome to Holland

 

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability – to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this…

 

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip – to Italy. You buy a bunch of guidebooks and make your wonderful plans.

The Coliseum, the Michelangelo David, the gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

 

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

 

"Holland?!" you say. "What do you mean, Holland?" I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy.

 

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

 

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to some horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

 

So you must go out and buy a new guidebook. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

 

It's just a different place. It's slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy.

But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around, and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills, Holland has tulips, Holland even has Rembrandts.

 

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

 

The pain of that will never, ever, go away, because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.

 

But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.

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Bacontk

Bacontk

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That is spot on. Although I don't have a child with a disability, my brother has had one since the day he was born so growing up I knew that I would need "guidebooks" for both Italy and Holland. Either way, Enjoy where you end up cause they are both beautiful places.

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GXPaycheck

GXPaycheck

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Yup, that just about says it all. Looks like Tanner will be ready soon to head for the beach and cruise for chicks!

My son Nick is 19.5 (high functioning autistic) and hopefully :xfingers: will get his drivers license soon. Looks like he will also be moving in with me for a while. Life never seems to go according to plan!

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Dr Jkel

Dr Jkel

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Dylan,

Great write up, my neighbors son has Downs Syndrome, awesome little boy, Jake is 5 and loves my Camaro, or Transformer as he calls it. Just once I wished I could make it Transform just to see the look on his face. I always have a statement that I attach to all my e-mails it goes like this

" LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS.....

IT'S ABOUT LEARNING TO DANCE IN THE RAIN!"

 

Tanner Man is lucky to have wonderful parents.

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09G8GT

09G8GT

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Dylan - thats a great post. It definetly backs up what my wife has said to me on different occasions. I will be sure to pass this on to her as she works with children with special needs (mainly autism) in a nearby school district and she will definetly appreciate it too!

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Team Adam's

Team Adam's

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Thanks for the kind words everyone. I couldn't be prouder of my little guy... he is my best buddy and every day has its challenges, but its also packed with little miracles as well.

 

Dylan,

Great write up, my neighbors son has Downs Syndrome, awesome little boy, Jake is 5 and loves my Camaro, or Transformer as he calls it. Just once I wished I could make it Transform just to see the look on his face. I always have a statement that I attach to all my e-mails it goes like this

" LIFE ISN'T ABOUT WAITING FOR THE STORM TO PASS.....

IT'S ABOUT LEARNING TO DANCE IN THE RAIN!"

 

Tanner Man is lucky to have wonderful parents.

 

I really like that saying... that is going in my list of quotes for sure.

 

For you neighbor maybe you need to invest in one of these costumes :jester:

 

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trashauler

trashauler

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What a great read! My hat is off to you Dylan. As a father of a soon to be six year old boy who was diagnosed with Sensory and thought to have Asberger's I can relate. Love my son to death no matter what. I just wish they didnt grow up so fast!

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Bluezey

Bluezey

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Good post Dylan, and it looks like Tanner has a real good support team!!:2thumbs:

 

Been to Hollland, it's not so bad, not what we were expecting, but not too bad either.

Our second daughter was born with cerebral palsy, and we have been going to therapy, have had operations, now for some thiry some years. We just got back from the 2010 Paralympic game in Vancouver, actually Whistler, where she competed in the slalom and giant slalom. This was her third paralympic games, she has been all over the world pursuing her dreams, and making friends as she has gone!!:rockon:

 

 

 

Bluezey:pc:

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Team Adam's

Team Adam's

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Good post Dylan, and it looks like Tanner has a real good support team!!:2thumbs:

 

Been to Hollland, it's not so bad, not what we were expecting, but not too bad either.

Our second daughter was born with cerebral palsy, and we have been going to therapy, have had operations, now for some thiry some years. We just got back from the 2010 Paralympic game in Vancouver, actually Whistler, where she competed in the slalom and giant slalom. This was her third paralympic games, she has been all over the world pursuing her dreams, and making friends as she has gone!!:rockon:

 

 

 

Bluezey:pc:

 

That is truly an awesome thing to hear!! Right now we're working on finding Tanners niche... being that hes only 3 there hasn't been that one thing he's jumped on just yet, but I hope we can find him his "slalom" eventually :2thumbs:

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